Failure to Rant

While I usually try to stick to the happier sides of life and not vent on my blog, I can't help it today. I am incredibly blessed and I shouldn't even complain or wish for something different than I have, because truth is- I have it pretty easy. But today all I want is to be back in Alaska living my vacation.

My sister and her family left this morning to head off to their new home in Missouri and I started a new job. Both of those things are wonderful, yet both are bringing tears to my eyes. I didn't get to hug my nephew goodbye and I was rushing out the door so I barely had time to hug my sister and nieces. I am terrible at starting new jobs (ok, I'm actually pretty good. I pick up quickly and retain information well) because I stress way too much and I hate getting in trouble. I am also having a serious battle in my head right now about calling my old job and seeing if they'd need me back... just so I don't have to start a new one. I was incredibly lucky with that job as well. PLUS if I had it my way, I wouldn't work. I'd stay home, go on adventures, and work on projects all day long. See?! I'm ridiculous!

The minute I started driving home today I turned on the music I'd listened to the most while in Alaska. I couldn't help but dream that I was back there now, or dream of packing up and heading that way. I should have waited to get a job and headed off to Missouri with my sister and her family. But I didn't. I made the smart decision instead. Go me.

So now that that is all out, my tears have stopped flowing and hopefully that's all I needed (doubt it). I didn't take one minute for granted in Alaska- except for the little time I spent stressing about the future. If I could do it over again (oh how I WISH I could!) I wouldn't stress one bit. But there's no point in thinking about what could have been done. I am glad that I was able to enjoy it so much and have such an amazing experience. I hope and pray that one day I'll be able to do it all over again. :)

What was the point of this post? To calm me down mostly. I stress over everything (obviously) and had to let it out. If you're thinking that I'm absolutely ridiculous right now, you're right. But do not worry, this is not the worst of my trials and worries in life. But trust me, you don't want to get into that. I thought this little bit would be safe to share and help me get over it. If you actually read all of this, thank you! You're amazing! If you didn't, eh, I don't blame you. Who wants to read the rants of a spoiled girl?

Want to know what else made it so I really have no right to rant?? Today I won a GIVEAWAY. Yep. And I am so excited about it! Yet I'm still trying to complain. Boy was this an unsuccessful post. That's ok. I don't care, because I feel better.

Oh, and if you care- my first day of work went really well. It was training day so it was very overwhelming. That's probably where this post came from. And I'm super nervous for tomorrow. But no, I'm not going to tell you where I work, because that's creepy. :)

Ok, promise this post is over. What a ridiculous post. And I just used the work "ridiculous" for a 3rd time in one post. It's all I've got. My brain's full. Have a great night everyone! haha!

OH! One more thing- promise. If I am a terrible comment-er from now for the next who knows how long? Blame my job. :(